THE BEASMAN bo game projections
SHUT YOUR CAKEHOLE, YOU CROSS-EYED, TWO BIT U OF SMELL CARDINAL BOOTLICKER! YOU MAKE ME SICK WITH ALL YOUR STUPID U OF SMELL CHIRPIN WHEN YOU KNOW DOWN IN YOUR HEART THAT U OF SMELL AIN’T POSED TO BE RANKED AHEAD OF U UH KAY. I HEARED ABOUT THAT PO AND IT MADE ME SICK TO MY STOMACH.

4-0#GoCards pic.twitter.com/kgboP4Dc1s

— Louisville Basketball (@LouisvilleMBB) November 18, 2019

MY TWITTER STARTS BLOWIN UP WITH ALL KINDA SMACK TAWK FROM BEER BREATH, NECK TATTOO, CURSIN AROUND BABIES, GODLESS, SPINELESS, BRAINLESS CARDINAL FANS SQUAWKIN ABOUT HOW LOSERVILLE IS AHEAD OF U UH KAY IN THE PO. BIG WHOOPTY DOO.

ALL YOU CARDINAL NITWITS SUDDENLY RUNNIN ROUND TAWKIN UP THE PO. IF YOU IS A U OF SMELLER, YOU IS INTERESTED IN HOs, NOT POs. (laffs) I’M STILL STINGIN FROM THAT EVANSVILLE DISASTER BUT I CAN STILL SLING THE FUNNY COMEDY JOKES, LARRY! (laff and then slowly turn it into crying) NAW…I AIN’T REALLY OVER LOSIN TO EVANSVILLE, DADGUMMIT! THEY JUST A BUNCH OF SMALL TOWN NOBODIES WHO AIN’T GOT NO BIDNIZ SCORIN MORE POINTS THAT MY KENTUCKY WILDCATS!

I HATE YOU WALTER MCCARTHY! DON’T COME AROUND HERE NO MORE ACTIN LIKE YOU LOVE THE CATS! YOU IS A BACKSTABBER! (cry) I HOPE YOU GIT SALMONELLA FROM A ROTTEN THANKSGIVING TURKEY, YOU WILDCAT DREAM CRUSHER! (cry)

I GOTTA JUST PRAY THAT U UH KAY GONNA SHAKE IT OFF LIKE TAYLOR SWIFFER AND GIT BACK TO PERFECTION! THIRTY NINE AND ONE! THIRTY NINE AND ONE! THIRTY NINE AND ONE! (laffs) BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN! GO BIG BLUE! GO CATS!

LARRY, KEEP ON SMIRKIN ABOUT YOUR FOOL’S GOLD CARDINAL BIRDS CUZ IT WON’T LAST! Y’ALL GOIN DOWN IN FLAMES COME DEE-CEMBER 28TH, YOU BALD HAIRED, SNAGGLE TOOTH, TRAITOR TURNCOAT LARRY DADGUM MINNER! COACH CAL – HE GOES TO MASS EVER DAY – COACH CAL SAYS EVANSVILLE WAS A WAKE UP CALL AND WE GONNA SEE N.B.A. LEVEL WILDCAT BASKETBAW FROM HERE ON OUT!

COME TO RUMP ARENER AND GIT YOUR WHOOPIN, U OF SMELL! LIL ARIANA GRANDE VOMITED ALL OVER THE VISITOR LOCKER ROOM AND WE JUST GONNA LEAVE IT IN THERE CUZ THAT’S WHERE U OF SMELL GOTTA GIT DRESSED IN A FEW WEEKS! (laffs) YOU GOIN DOWN, BALDY MACK! SO TAKE YOUR FANCY RANKIN IN THE PO AND DANCE AROUND RIGHT NOW CUZ IT AIN’T GONNA HOLD FOR LONG! (laffs)

WHAT ABOUT FOOTBAW! STOOPS TROOPS DONE LOOKED LIKE NATIONAL CHAMPEENS AGAIN WHOOPIN UP ON VANDERSMELT. THAT’S A BIGTIME S.E.C. WIN, LARRY MINNER! THE S.E.C. IS SO MUCH GOODER THAN ALL YOU LITTLE POP WARNER SISSY LEAGUES LIKE THE A.C.C. I THINK A.C.C. STANDS FOR “ALMOST COLLEGE COMPETITION” SO THEY KNOW IT AIN’T AS GOOD AS WHAT KENTUCKY DOES. THE CATS IS GOIN BOWLIN CUZ VANDERSMELT WAS WIN #5 AND WE PLAYIN SOME NOBODY NEXT WEEK TO GIT 6 WINS!

“It’s all of us. It takes every single one of us.” – @CoachSattUofL#GoCards pic.twitter.com/KuwjUF305g

— Louisville Football (@UofLFootball) November 17, 2019

AND THEN SMUG LITTLE LOSERVILLE IS COMIN TO LEXINUN TWO DAYS AFTER THANKSGIVIN TO GET SLICED UP LIKE TOM TURKEY! (laffs) BIG DEAL…Y’ALL BEAT N.C. STATE AND WAKE FOREST ON THE ROAD. OHHHH…LIKE THEY’S GOOD. COME AND GIT YOU SOME OF THESE WILDCATS, CARDINAL NOBODIES! COACH GOMER PYLE SATTERFELLER AIN’T GONNA KNOW WHAT HIT HIM WHEN STOOPS TROOPS DANCE ALL OVER THE CARDINALS GRAVE! RIGHT NOW THEY’S PROJECT-TI-FYIN THAT U OF SMELL WILL PLAY TENNERSEE IN A DEE-CEMBER 30TH BO GAME AND U UH KAY GOT T.C.U. ON DECEMBER 31ST.

BUT I HOPE THAT’S WRONG AND INSTEAD THE BO PEOPLE PUT US IN THE SAME BO GAME SO WE CAN BEAT YOUR BRAINS OUT TWO TIMES IN A ROW! (laffs) BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN! MATT JONES FOR PRESIDENT! MATT JONES FOR PRESIDENT! FIRE LARRY MINNER! FIRE LARRY MINNER! GO BIG BLUE! GO BIG BLUE! GO BIG BLUE! AWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! LET’S BEAT THE LITTLE NOBODY WE’S PLAYIN TONIGHT AND BURN A WALTER MCCARTHY STATUE AT HALFTIME! GO CATS! GO BLUE!