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ONE AND NONE — The Beasman hopes the U of Smellers die two painful deaths this holiday weekend

by terrymeiners - 0

THE BEASMAN two Cardinal deaths
LARRY, LARRY, LARRY! (laffs) I HOPE SANTA CLAUS BRINGS YOU SOME BRAINS THIS YEAR! (laffs) EVERTHANG YOU SAY IS WRONG AND STUPID! (laffs) SHUT YOUR CAKEHOLE TAWKIN ABOUT U UH KAY NOT LIKIN DUKE LOSIN’ LAST NIGHT! ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS LOVE WHEN DUKE LOSES, EVEN IF IT MEANS GOOD STUFF FOR LOSERVILLE. BIG BLUE NATION’S MOTTO IS: “DUKE IN PAIN IS U UH KAY’S GAIN!” (laffs)

POOR LITTLE DUKIES…CRYIN THEIR LITTLE DUKIE TEARS ON THEIR FANCY DUKIE CLOTHES AND ALL OVER THEIR FANCY DUKIE CARS. OH BOO HOO HOO! THEY GOT WHOOPED BY STEPHEN A SMIFF! (laffs) AIN’T NOBODY TAWKIN ABOUT U UH KAY LOSIN TO EVANSVILLE NO MORE CUZ DUKE GITTIN ALL THE SMACK TAWK NOW! (laffs) OF COURSE, ALL YOU SNAGGLE TOOTH, SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, MAKING BABIES OUT OF WEDLOCK, GOD HATIN, BRAINLESS, SPINELESS, GUTLESS CARDINAL REDNECKS IS ALL JACKED UP ABOUT DUKE LOSIN CUZ YOU THINK THAT MAKES YOU #1 BUT YOU IS WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! (laffs)

SEE, YOU AIN’T NEVER GONNA GIT A SNIFF OF THAT #1 RANKIN CUZ THEM GOOD OL WESTERN KENTUCKY HILLTOPPERS GONNA BEAT Y’ALL CARDINAL FRAUDS ON BLACK FRIDEE! (laffs) U OF SMELL GONNA GIT A ONE-TWO PUNCH BY REAL KENTUCKY COLLEGES TWO DAYS IN A ROW! (laffs) ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS IS BIIIIIGGGG HILLTOPPER FANS RIGHT NOW! (laffs) GO TOPS! GO HILLTOPPERS! USUALLY WE MAKE FUN OF Y’ALL FOR BEIN A BUNCH OF RED TOWEL WAVIN WILDCAT WANNABES BUT NAWWWW, NOT TODAY!

U UH KAY WILDCAT FANS LOVE THE HILLTOPPERS CUZ Y’ALL GOT THE PIRE TO SNATCH THAT #1 RANKIN AWAY FROM THE CARDINAL CONVICTS WHO ALSO HATE YOU AND THINK YOU IS THEIR LITTLE BROTHER! (laffs) SO GO CRUSH THEM NASTY CARDINAL BEAKS, HILLTOPPERS AND – POOF! – THAT #1 RANKIN GOES UP IN SMOKE! (laffs) I LOVE IT!

THEN ON SAIRDEE, STOOPS TROOPS GONNA SMASH A GARBAGE CAN ALL OVER U OF SMELL AGAIN! KAPOW! KAPOW! U OF SMELL GITS THEIR JAW JACKED TWO DAYS IN A ROW! I LOVVVVVVVVE IT! (laffs) LET’S GO HILLTOPPERS! LET’S GO STOOPS TROOPS! US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS CAN GO DOWN TO NASHVILLE ON FRIDAY TO CHEER FOR THE HILLTOPPERS TO WHOMP ON BALDY MACK’S CARDINAL NOBODIES – OVER-RATED! – OVER-RATED! – AND THEN U UH KAY FANS ROLL UP TO KAY-ROGER FIELD FOR THE DOUBLE TREAT OF SEEIN STOOPS TROOPS BASH THE BRAINS OUT OF LOSERVILLE FOOTBAW AND THEIR DIM WITTED COACH GOMER PYLE! (laffs)

IT’S ALL COMIN TOGETHER, CAT FANS! THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST WEEKEND EVER WITH CARDINAL TEARS FLOWIN LIKE NI-AGGER FALLS! (laffs) BETTER ENJOY YOUR THANKSGIVIN TURKEY MUSH AND PLUM PUDDIN PIE, YOU CARDINAL CONVICTS CUZ YOUR HAPPY DAYS IS OVER! (laffs) AND STOP YOUR FRAUD CAMPAIGN OF PUTTIN UP A FAKE NEWS BANNER OF FINAL FOUR MVPs. REAL BASKETBAW FANS KNOW Y’ALL LOST YOUR STRIPPER POLE CHAMPERCHIP BANNER CUZ YOU LET PROSTER-TUTES RUN FREE IN THE DARM-I-TORY AND SLICK RICK WAS BUYIN REE-CRUITS!

IF U OF SMELL IS GONNA HANG A NEW BANNER TO CELERBRATE THEIR CHEATIN CARDINAL CRIMINALS THEN U UH KAY NEEDS TO HANG A BANNER CELEBRATIN THEIR MISUNDERSTOOD WILDCAT CRIMINAL HEROES LIKE TOM PAYNE, RICHIE FARMER, MICHAEL PORTER, DEANDRE LIGGONS, AND MAYBE A EXTRA TRIBUTE TO TERRENCE JONES FOR BOOT-STOMPIN A HOMELESS GUY! (laffs) ANYTHING U OF SMELL CAN DO, U UH KAY CAN DO BETTER! (laffs) AWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! GO HILLTOPPERS…BEAT THAT BALDY MACK TEAM SO THEY CAINT BE #1. AND GO STOOPS TROOPS! BEAT LOSERVILLE FOOTBAW LIKE YOU DONE LAST YEAR! YOU SUCK, CARDINALS!

terrymeiners
dad. husband. observer. media personality. pathological flyer.
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