THE BEASMAN u of smell still winning
I AIN’T NO SWISHY BOY BUT THAT BRAD PITT FELLER LOOKED DELICIOUS ON THE OSCARS LAST NIGHT. (laffs) I TURNT IT ON CUZ THE TV GUIDE SAID OSCARS SHOW SO I FIGGERED IT WAS OSCAR COMBS TAWKIN ABOUT OUR BELOVED KENTUCKY WILDCATS. (laffs) BUT THAT BRAD PITT MAYBE OUGHT TO BE THE NEXT COACH OF THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS SO ALL THE LADIES WILL KEEP BUYIN OVERPRICED RUMP ARENER SEASON TICKETS TO WATCH OUR NOT-EVEN-IN-THE-TOP-16 CATS!

DEAR GOD, WHY YOU GOTTA HAVE THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS JUST PLAYIN MEDIA-OCRE? LIFE AIN’T NO FUN WHEN U UH KAY AIN’T RANKED TOP 5 AND NICK DICKS RICHARDS AIN’T WORTHY OF BEIN A TOP TIN SINNER IN COLLEGE BASKETBAW! US GOOD AND CLASSY KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS DON’T KNOW WHETHER TO POOTY OUR PANTS OR WIND OUR WATCH WHEN THE NC2A PUMPS OUT THE TOP 4 SEEDS IN ALL THE REGIONS AND U UH KAY AIN’T ONE OF ‘EM.

ADOLPH RUMP MUST BE SPINNIN IN PURGATORY, DADGUMMIT! PLUS, THAT UGLY RED TEAM WON’T GO AWAY. NAW. I AIN’T GOT A LOT OF Ls DOWN GRENADES TO THROW AT YOU THIS WEEK, LARRY, CUZ YOUR RUM DUMMY CARDINAL BIRDS KEEP WINNING. BUT YOU AND YOUR CARDINAL FAN BASE IS STILL A BUNCH OF LIQUOR BREATH, SNAGGLE TOOTH, NECK TATTOO, MAN WEARIN EARRINGS, STREET TRASH, SO THAT WON’T NEVER CHANGE. BUT I TELL YOU WHAT…I’M SICK OF HEARIN BOUT Y’ALL BEIN A #2 SEED OR MAYBE EVEN A #1. GIVES ME A ULCER, IT DOES!

Snapped the streak. Finished another week on top of the ACC.

📹: #Team106 | Win 21 pic.twitter.com/1WD8Mt7Sd8

— Louisville Basketball (@LouisvilleMBB) February 10, 2020

EVER TIME U OF SMELL COMES ON TV I TURNT IT ON AND CHEER FOR WHOEVER IS PLAYIN AGAINST LOSERVILLE. I JUST ABOUT THROWED MY BACK OUT JUMPIN UP AND DOWN TRYNA HELP VIRGINNY BEAT Y’ALL ON SAIRDEE IN THE CHICKEN BUCKET. THEM DADGUM WAHOOS – AND TELL THAT KATIE GEORGE THAT THE WHOLE WORD IS DADGUMMIT, NOT NO D-A-G-G-U-M LIKE ROY WILLIAMS SAYS – THEM DADGUM VIRGINNY WAHOOS HAD YOU LOSERVILLE FRAUDS BEAT WHEN VIRGINNY COME BACK FROM 15 DOWN.

THAT ONE FELLER WHO LOOKED LIKE SNOOPY DOGG DOGG KEPT HITTIN THEM 3s AND ALL US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS WAS-A SCREAMIN GOOOOOO VIRGINNY! BEAT THAT CARDINAL GARBAGE AND BREAK THAT WINNIN STREAK! BUT NAWWWW, Y’ALL GOT LUCKY AGAIN, YOU BUNCH OF TRAILER PARK, FOULMOUTH, JESUS-HATIN, LIBERAL WELFARE STAMP, CARDINAL FANS!

ME AND ALL MY WILDCAT BUDDIES BOUT WORE OURSELFS OUT THROWIN PILLOWS AT THE T.V. EVER TIME LOSERVILLE WOULD SCORE ANOTHER BUCKET TO HOLD THE LEAD. MAKES ME SICK WHEN Y’ALL IS RANKED HIGHER THAN MY PRECIOUS KENTUCKY WILDCATS!

COACH CAL – HE GOES TO MASS EVER DAY – AND I GUESS THAT’S WHY WE AIN’T NO GOOD NO MORE CUZ GOD IS TIRED OF THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS BEIN COACHED BY SLICK HAIRED, I-TALIAN, CARPETBAGGIN CATHLICK, BINGO PLAYIN, BEER DRINKIN, NASTY DANCIN, ROSARY BEAD RUBBIN FALSE GOD WORSHIPPERS.

Video: @UKCoachCalipari – Tennessee Postgame #BBN #TGT https://t.co/IekHLpa58q

— Kentucky Basketball (@KentuckyMBB) February 8, 2020

ONCE U UH KAY HIRES A REAL TRUE BLUE CHRISTIAN COACH THEN GOD WILL START ANSWERIN BIG BLUE NATION’S PRAYERS AGAIN. I MEAN, YEAH, WE BEAT TENNERSEE AND ALL THAT, BUT THIS YEAR’S CATS STILL THROW UP CLUNKERS PURDY REG-LAR AND SO WE GONNA GIT BOUNCED FROM MARCH MADNESS PURDY QUICK. COACH CAL SAYS IT’S THE OTHER TEAM’S SUPER BO. WELL THEN HOW COME WE DON’T ALWAYS ACT LIKE WE IS PLAYIN IN A SUPER BO, DADGUMMIT!

BASKETBAW GOTTA SHINE CUZ LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR DONE GONE OFF TO BE THE NEW PATRICK MAHOMES. U UH KAY FOOTBAW IS LIKE A FLOOSIE GIRLFRIEND RIGHT BEFORE VALENTIME’S DAY….GOT DUMPED! WE GOT TO COACH UP BIG BLUE BASKETBAW BEFORE MARCH MADNESS! WE SUPPOSUBLY GIT THE #1 REE-CRUITS BUT THEN THEY GIT HERE AND START SUCKIN. THAT’S ON COACH CAL, DADGUMMIT! GIT THAT HANDSOME BRAD PITT AS KENTUCKY’S NEXT COACH CUZ AIN’T NOBODY WON’T RUN THROUGH A WALL FOR BRAD PITT!

NOW THE CATS OUGHTA WIN TOMORRY AGAINST VANDERSMELT AND THEN MISTERSIPPY BUT THEN WE GOT 4 IN A ROW WE COULD LOSE. WE GOT L.S.WHO, THEN FLORIDER, TEXAS A&P, AND THEN SWEATY BRUCE PEARL AND AUBURN AGAIN. I DON’T LIKE IT ONE BIT, LARRY MINNER. COACH CAL BETTER QUIT PHONIN IT IN OR WE BOUT TO MAKE A CHANGE! STOP WHININ BOUT BEIN IN ERRBODY’S SUPER BO! IF WE’S IN A SUPER BO THEN COACH LIKE IT!

WE AIN’T THE FARTY NINERS…DADGUMMIT…WE IS PATRICK KAJONES! COACH EM UP OR GIT OUTTA TOWN, YOU CATHLICK CRYBABY! WE NEED US A BABDIZ COACH OR THAT PURDY BRAD PITT TO BLIND THE OTHER TEAM WITH HIS BEAUTY! COME ON, CATS! THERE’S STILL TIME TO GIT BUSPECTACLE AND GET A #1 SEED AHEAD OF LOSERVILLE! AWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! COME SEE ABOUT IT! COME SEE ABOUT IT!