A party in Lexington 35 years in the making ⌠#ForTheTeam Chapter Five đźđ pic.twitter.com/c3h3ZQ0Nd1 â Kentucky Football (@UKFootball) October 7, 2021 KENTUCKY FOOTBALL IS A THING! The Kentucky Wildcats jumped from #31 to #16 in the Associated Press poll after a hard fought victory over #10 Florida. It was Kentucky's first home victory over the Gators since 1986. Street party couch burnings went on until the wee hours. UK is now 5-0 and welcoming a struggling LSU squad into Kroger Field on Saturday night. In a rare departure from oddsmaker behavior, Kentucky is a 2 point favorite. Finish the play. Finish the game. Finish what you start. Do that, and anything can happen. pic.twitter.com/XVBvTWTo9F â LSU Football (@LSUfootball) October 7, 2021 THE BEASMAN florida goes down LATER GATOR! LATER GATOR! LATER
Tag: mark stoops
Gun-tucky Wildcats arrested, Beasman begs U of Smell to take the blame
THE BEASMAN six wildcats arrested I AINâT HAD A WINK O SLEEP WORRYIN IF ANY MORE KENTUCKY WILDCATS GONNA GIT SENT TO THE POKEY! (cry) I BOUT HADDA STROKE WHEN THEY SAID 6 U UH KAY FOOTBAW PLAYERS POINTED A GUN AT A LOYAL TRUE BLUE KENTUCKY WILDCAT FAN. I MEAN, IF THEY WAS PISTOL WHIPPIN A LOSERVILLE CARDINAL FAN, I COULD TOTALLY UNDERSTAND. BUT NAWâŚWE GOT US A BONER-FIED BIG BLUE BOO HOO! US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS LOVE TAUNTIN OTHER SCHOOLS WHEN THEYâS IN TROUBLE. BUT CATS POINTIN GUNS AT OTHER CATS AINâT GONNA WIN US THE NOBEL PRIEST PRIZE. (cry) OUR CLASSY CAT PLAYERS DONE BEAT UP SOME FRATERNITY PUNK BUT HE IS A WILDCAT FRATERNITY PUNK SO WE
The Beasman is stunned by the NBA draft aversion to choosing Wildcats
THE BEASMAN nba draft disaster ITâS ANOTHER DARK DAY IN WILDCAT COUNTRY, LARRY MINNER! (cry) WHAT KIND OF DRUGS IS THEM NBA COACHES SNIFFIN? I WAS SETTIN THERE LAST NIGHT BU-SPECTIN THE FIRST 3 PICKS TO BE THE U UH KAY KENTUCKY WILDCATS, RIGHT? YâALL BOUT TO PICK I-ZAYER JACKSON FIRST! THEN GONNA BE BRANDO BOSTON! NEXT COME OLIVIER SARR FROM U UH KAY! (cry) BUT NAWWWW! EVER TIME THAT BALD HAIRED, MEERKAT LOOKIN NBA COMMISH-NER WALKED UP TO THE PODIUM HE WOULD CALL OUT THE NAME OF A LOSER FROM SOME OTHER SCHOOL, NOT KENTUCKY! (cry) THEY TOOK GUYS FROM OKLAHOMO STATE, GONZAGGER, STANFORD, ALAMBAMMER, THE MEMPHIS Y.M.C.A. AND EVEN DADGUM TENNERSEE! THEY PICKED A DADGUM PUKE ARNGE TENNERSEE GUY
THE BEASMAN: If Coach Cal doesn’t beat his Catholic Notre Dame buddies, it’s curtains from Cat fans
THE BEASMAN cats losing streak continues (cry) THIS CAINT BE CHRISTMAS TIMEâŚITâS STILL HALLER-WEEN FOR KENTUCKY WILDCAT FANS. (cry) I CAINT BLEEVE WE PAY COACH CAL 9 MILLION A YEAR TO GIVE US THIS DUMPSTER FIRE! WE JUST GOT BOOT STOMPED BY A WINLESS NOBODY JARJUH TECH NERD SCHOOL! (cry) DADGUMMIT, WE IS BIG BLUE NATION! WE IS THE CATS! COACH CAL DONE MAILIN IT IN, LARRY! HE LOOKS LIKE A OLD HIPPIE FREAK WITH HIS LONG HAIR AND BEER BELLY. AND SO OUR U UH KAY WILDCAT PLAYERS IS PROLLY SNIFFIN THE POT LIKE THEIR HIPPIE HEAD COACH! DADGUMMITâŚTHE WILDCAT TRAIN DONE RUN OFF THE TRACKS! THE CATS IS MAKIN MORE TURNOVERS THAN BETTY CROCKER. THAT BIG TRANSFER FELLERâŚOLIVER SARRâŚHEâS OLIVER SORRY!
WE WANT BAMA! cried The Beasman ahead of a Crimson Tide beatdown of the Cats
THE BEASMAN we want bama WE WANT BAMA! WE WANT BAMA! GO BIG BLUE! GO CATS! BAMA IS GOIN DOWN! BAMA AINâT NOBODY! THEY BUSPOSABLY IS RANKED NUMBER ONE BUT AMERICA AINâT SEEN WHAT KENTUCKY CAN DO YET! WE IS BRINGIN THE PAIN TRAIN TO TUSCALOOSER! (laffs) WE IS KENTUCKY! WEâS THE BIG BLUE! AWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! WE DONE PUT A WHOOPIN ON THEM SMARTY PANTS VANDERSMELT NERDS BUT WE DINT USE NONE OF OUR GOOD PLAYS. NAWâŚWE SAVIN THEM FOR BAMA CUZ STOOPS KNOWS WHEN WE BEAT BAMA THEN WE IS #1! (laffs) WE GONNA CRUSH SABANâS SISSIES BY USIN TWO QUARTERBACKS, THE ONE WHO CAN RUN DOWN LOW AND THE ONE WHO CAN PASS SETTIN UP ON HIS SHOULDERS!
That other Tennessee tornado took down the Kentucky Wildcats
THE BEASMAN cats lose senior night to tennessee SHUT YOUR UGLY CARDINAL FACE RIGHT NOW CUZ I KNOW YOU IS SMIRKIN RIGHT NOW! ADMIT IT, LARRY MINNER! YOU AND YOUR OTHER CROSS-EYED, BALD HAIRED, STINKBREATH, NECK TATTOO, WELFARE STAMP, SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, LIBRUL DEMMERCRAT LOSERVILLE CARDINAL FANS IS ALL JUST HA-HA-HA-in ABOUT AMERICAâS TEAM, THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS LOSIN SENIOR NIGHT IN RUMP ARENER TO NOBODY TENNERSEE. (cry) THIS HERE IS (cry) THIS ONE (cry) THIS HERE A-BOMM-ER-A-SHUN IS THE WORST KENTUCKY BASKETBAW MOMENT OF COACH CALâS TIME HERE. (cry) DADGUMMIT, THE GOOD AND CLASSY WILDCATS WAS UP BY 17 AND THEN, SOMEHOW, COACH CAL FORGOT HOW TO COACH! WHY IS WE PAYIN YOU 7 MILLION A YEAR IF
The Beasman is feasting on U of Smell’s losing streak while the Cats soar
Started 2020 with a W in front of 20,396 Cats fans in @Rupp_Arena. You đto see these highlights. pic.twitter.com/Ws21BDDvYo— Kentucky Basketball (@KentuckyMBB) January 4, 2020 THE BEASMAN loserville losing streak (chuckling) ZIPPITY DO DAH, ZIPPITY DAY. MY OH MY WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY! (laffs) LOSERVILLE GOTTA LONGER LOSIN STREAK THAN I-RANIAN GENERALS HANGIN ROUND AIRPORTS! (laffs) YâALL CANâT EVEN BEAT AN EGG! (laffs) U OF SMELL SUCKS SO BAD THAT CHRIS MACK GOT A JOB OFFER FROM ROOMBA! (laffs) YOU GOTTA LAFF AT MY FUNNY COMEDY JOKES, LARRY MINNER, CUZ AINâT NOTHIN ELSE FUNNY ON THIS PATHETIC RADIO SHOW. (laffs) HAVE YOU SEEN THE NEW TOP 25 PO? SOMETHIN BLUE IS ON THE RISE AND SOMETHIN RED IS JUST BOUT DEAD!
Ls Down! Cats crush Cards and the Beasman can’t stop giggling
THE BEASMAN cats crush cards (long laff) GO BIG BLUE! STOOPS TROOPS! LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR FOR HEISHMAN! CATS! CATS! CATS! AWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! (laffs) THAT WERENâT HEAVY RAIN FALLIN ALL DAY â THAT WAS CARDINAL TEARS POURIN DOWN! (laffs) LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR IS WAYYYYYY BETTER THAN LAY-MAR JACKSON, AND YOU KNOW IT, YOU SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, MAN WEARIN EARRINGS U OF SMELL CARDINAL CRACKHEADS! LAYMAR JACKSON CAINT HOLD LYNN BOWIEâS JOCKSTRAP, DADGUMMIT! Live Now:@UKCoachStoops - Louisville Postgame Press Conference https://t.co/UhR0BFOSAV— Kentucky Football (@UKFootball) November 30, 2019 COACH STOOPS TODE ME THE BALTIMORE RAVENS CALLED TO AST IF LYNN BOWIE JUNIOR COULD COME START FOR THE RAVENS RIGHT NOW SO THEY COULD PUT LAY-MAR ON WAIVERS! ITâS TRUE! THE
Holy Toledo! U uh Kay footbaw gets less attention than Fraidy Cat Matt
THE BEASMAN game time GO BIG BLUE! GO BIG BLUE! GO BIG BLUE! PAY COACH STOOPS! PAY COACH STOOPS! BEAT TOE-LEEDER! BEAT TOE-LEEDER! (laffs) OLâ BALD-HAIRED LARRY MINNER IS THE LONELIEST GUY IN KENTUCKY. (laffs) YOU THE ONLY GUY STILL AT WORK! ERRBODY ELSE OFF HAVING THEIR LABOR DAY WEEKEND SO NOBODY IS LISSENIN TO YOUR STUPID RADIO SHOW! (laffs) YOU OUGHTA ASK BOOGIE COUSINS TO PUT A BULLET IN YOUR BALD HEAD! (laffs) FREE BOOGIE! FREE BOOGIE! THAT AINâT BOOGIE ON THE TAPE! LARRY MINNER, THE KARMA TRAIN IS COMIN FOR YOU MONDEE NIGHT! (laffs) YOUâLL BE CRYIN LIKE A BABY WHEN THEM DRUNK CATHLICKS GIT HERE FOR FOOTBAW! (laffs) YOUR CARDINAL FEATHERS GONNA BE SPRAYED ALL OVER THE TRAIN YARD
Happy Blue Year! Cats own the world, Cards fans in hiding
THE BEASMAN uk wins the world CATS WIN! BLUE GITS IN! CATS WIN! BLUE GITS IN! (laffs) ALL WE DO IS WIN, WIN, WIN! ALL WE DO IS WIN! WIN! WINNNNNN! (laffs) SNELL YEAH! SNELL YEAH! Ls DOWN! Ls DOWN! (laffs) LARRY MINNER AND ALL HIS SNAGGLE TOOTH CARDINAL CONVICT FANS AINâT GOT NO REASON TO LIVE NO MORE! (laffs) WHY DONâT YâALL SAGGY PANTS, RAP MUSIC, NECK TATTOO, WELFARE STAMP CASHIN, GRAFFITI PAINTIN, GANG BANG THUG LOSERVILLE FANS JUST BOW DOWN AND ADMIT THAT U UH KAY IS YOUR MASTER! DO IT, LARRY! SAY THAT U UH KAY IS YOUR BIG BROTHER DOMMERATOR RIGHT NOW OR YOU IS A BROADCAST FRAUD! (laffs) IF YOUR CAINT ADMIT THAT U UH