THE BEASMAN new UK coaches
I HEARED YOU ON THERE A-MOCKIN THAT NEW U UH KAY BASKETBAW COACH “THE CHIN” FOR SAYIN MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY GOOD TIMES IS A-COMIN TO BIG BLUE NATION! LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHIN, YOU BALD HAIRED, STINKBREATH, PENCIL NECK, NOT FUNNY, OVERRATED, SNAGGLE TOOTH LOUDMOUTH U OF SMELL BUTTKISSIN NOBODY…IF THE CHIN EVER CATCHES YOU OFF BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN WHERE YOU LIVE WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND SLICK RICK, THE CHIN SAYS HE’S GONNA KNOCK THEM LAST TWO HAIRS OFF YOUR PUMPKIN HEAD! (laffs)
Chin already working hard. Let’s let the good times roll! #BBN x #LaFamilia pic.twitter.com/bLvhWwnw4W
— Kentucky Basketball (@KentuckyMBB) May 6, 2021
DON’T YOU LOWDOWN U OF SMELL CARDINAL BIRDS GO A-MAWKIN THE UNIVERSITY OF KENTUCKY BOUT NOTHIN CUZ Y’ALL AIN’T NOTHIN BUT A STINKY, DEATH PENALTY, BANNER DOWN, COLLEGE CHEATIN FRAUD SCHOOL! I HEAR TELL THE LOSERVILLE PRESIDENT WON’T ALLOW THE MAILMAN TO STEP ON CAMPUS FOR THE LAST 5 YEARS CUZ SHE’S AFRAID HE’S BRINGIN ANOTHER NOTICE OF ALLERGATIONS FROM THE NC2A! (laffs) ALL Y’ALL GOT IS COURT DATES AND ALL THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS GOT IS COURT GREATNESS!
COACH CAL DONE GOT HIS SECOND WIND! HE’S SWAGGY CAL AGAIN! YEAH! COACH CAL – HE GOES TO MASS EVER DAY – HE DONE WALKED OUTTA CHURCH THIS MARNIN AND SAID GOD TODE HIM TO HAVE MERCY ON THE OTHER TEAMS THIS FALL CUZ U UH KAY GONNA BE FREAKY GOOD! YEAH! GOD TODE COACH CAL TO PREPARE FOR ANOTHER TITLE AND TO EXPECT ‘EM EVER YEAR FOR THE NEXT DECADE! 10 IN A ROW FOR THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS CUZ WE GOT THE RIGHT COACHES IN PLACE!
TONY ORLANDO ANTIGUER COME BACK AND NOW THE CHIN IS ALSO HERE TO MAKE SURE U UH KAY WINS MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY CHAMPERCHIPS TO SHOW THE WORLD WE IS #1 AND U OF SMELL IS N.I.T. GARBAGE! (laffs) HOW’S CHRIS BALDY MACK DOIN WITH RECRUITIN? COACH CAL DONE GOT ALL THE GOOD GUYS FROM THE TRANSFER PORT-O-LET AND THAT MEANS U OF SMELL GOTTA SCRAPE THE BOTTOM! THAT DON’T SOUND VERY GOOD, LARRY! CHRIS MACK IS A FAILURE.
YOUR FOOTBAW COACH GOMER PYLE SATTERFILL DONE SLID Y’ALL TO THE BOTTOM OF THE S.E.C. DID YOU NOTICE WHO WENT FIRST IN THE NFL DRAFT? JAY-MON DAVIS FROM U UH KAY! AND THEN 5 MORE KENTUCKY WILDCATS GOT DRAFTED FROM STOOPS TROOPS! ALL LOSERVILLE GOT DRAFTED WAS THAT MIDGET TUTU CANTWELL! (laffs) AND THEN THEY TOOK A COUPLE MORE LOSERVILLE SCRUBS RIGHT AT THE END SO THEY CAN BEAT EM UP ON PRACTICE SQUADS! LOSERVILLE IS A FAILURE, LARRY!
Y’ALL HAD A BOLLYBAW TEAM IN THE NC2A TOURNEYMINT BUT THEY GOT KNOCKED OUT RIGHT AWAY. REMIND ME OF WHO WON THE BOLLYBAW NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIP! OH YEAH! KENTUCKEEEEEEEEEE! WE GOT MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY BANNERS TO HANG WHILE U OF SMELL GOT MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY FARMER PLAYERS IN PRISON! (laffs) HEY MOMS AND DADS, SIGN UP YOUR KIDS FOR COACH CAL’S SUMMER CAMPS!
FATHER-SON, FATHER-DAUGHTER, AND THE 3 DAY CAMP CAL WILL ALL TEACH EXCELLENT BASKETBAW SKILLS AND FAMILY BONDING IN A GOOD, WHOLESOME ENVIROMENT. OR YOU CAN SIGN UP FOR U OF SMELL SUMMER CAMP WHERE THEY TEACH KIDS HOW TO STEAL, CARJACK, SPRAY GRAFFITI, THROW MOLOTOV COCKTAILS AT GUMMIT BUILDINGS, CURSE THE AMERICAN FLAG, AND DESTROY PRIVATE PROPERTY JUST TO SHOW YOU’S WOKE! YOUR PICK, PARENTS! (laffs) AWWWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! LET’S GO BLUE!