“When is the draft? When is the combine? … Will there even be a draft?”

—@UKCoachCalipari on preparing his players for the NBA Draft amid uncertainty pic.twitter.com/bVIZHxNTNZ

— ESPN (@espn) March 12, 2020

THE BEASMAN blue don’t git in
(cry) I AIN’T BEEN ABLE TO GIT OUTTA BED, LARRY MINNER. (cry) NAWWW, I AIN’T GOT THE CRONY VIRUS LIKE ALL THE OTHER OLD PEOPLE. (cry) SOME MILLENNIAL PUNK SEEN ME LIMPIN OUT TO THE MAILBOX AND SHOUTED: “K. O., BOOMER!” (cry) BUT I AIN’T GOIN DOWN TO NO CRONY VIRUS LIKE SOME CITY SISSY. (cry)

BUT I COULD CROAK FROM A BROKEN HEART. MY BIG BLUE NATION GOT SHUT DOWN AT TOURNEYMINT TIME, DADGUMMIT! I’M JUST SO TORE UP ABOUT THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS NOT GITTIN TO GO WIN ANOTHER NATIONAL CHAMPERCHIPS JUST CUZ SOME CHINESE GUY CHOPPED UP SOME LIZARDS AND SKUNKS AND STARTED A KILLER DISEASE. (cry) DADGUMMIT…Y’ALL FERRENERS DONE KILT THE COLLEGE BASKETBAW TOURNEYMINT AND AMERICA IS DEE-PRESSED! (cry)

THE STANK MARKET KEEPS NOSE DIVIN. RESTRUNTS IS CLOSIN. UBER DRIVERS GOT NO WORK. AIN’T NO HOTELS GOT NO FANS. PEOPLE WHO PRINT BRACKETS IS BANKRUPT. (cry) IT’S LIKE ALL THE PEOPLE SKEERED OF A LITTLE VIRUS SO THEY ALL GONE IN THEIR PANIC ROOMS. ONLY PEOPLE MAKIN MONEY IS NETFLIX AND TARLIT PAPER SCALPERS. (cry)

I DON’T KNOW IF I WANNA GO ON LIVIN WITHOUT NO BASKETBAW. US CAT FANS LIVE TO TAUNT THE FANS OF WHOEVER WE’S PLAYIN. YOU SUCK! COME SEE ABOUT IT! BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN! BUT NOW BLUE AIN’T GITTIN IN!

HOW BOUT WE DEE-CIDE WHO WINS MARCH MADNESS BASED ON WHO GOT THE MOST LOYAL FANS? KENTUCKY WINS! YOU OUGHT TO SEE THE PARKIN LOT DOWN IN NASHVILLE FILT UP WITH RUSTY PICKUP TRUCKS AND POP-UP CAMPERS. EVER ONE OF ‘EM FLYIN A BIG BLUE FLAG, DADGUMMIT!

WHEN KENTUCKY FANS SHOW UP TO CHEER ON BIG BLUE IT’S LIKE WOODSTOCK FOR HILLBILLIES! AND OUR MOONSHINE IS 10 TIMES STRONGER THAN THEM HIPPIES SNIFFIN THE MARY-JUH-WANNA! (laffs) EVEN WILLIE NELSON STOPPED BY AND DRANK SOME KENTUCKY MOONSHINE.

AFTER JUST ONE SIP WILLIE THROWED HIS MARIJUANNER DOWN IN THE SEWER AND SAID HE’S A SHINE GUY NOW! (LAFFS) THESE IS BAAAAAD TIMES, LARRY MINNER! NOW WE GOT NOTHIN BUT FEAR OF A LITTLE OL DISEASE KEEPIN OUR GOOD AND CLASSY CATS FROM GITTIN ANOTHER TITLE! THINK BACK TO 2013, LARRY. YOUR U OF SMELL HEROES DINT LET THEM DISEASES THEY GOT FROM STRIPPERS KEEP THEM FROM WINNIN THEIR CHAMPERCHIPS SO WHY IS EVERBODY SO PARANOID THIS YEAR BOUT THE CRONY VIRUS?

Thank you for an incredible 5 years card nation. If I could do it all over again, I’d be right back here. Ended in the most unimaginable way, but God has His plan. Once again, thank you.. love forever 🤞🏼❤️ pic.twitter.com/oUIcBVBicE

— Ryan McMahon (@RyanMcMahon) March 12, 2020

LET THE KIDS PLAY, DADGUMMIT!

BUT IF THE NC2A GONNA GO SPINELESS AND CANCEL IT ALL, AT LEAST SEND THE TROPHY TO LEXINUN CUZ WE DONE EARNT IT! MEMBER BACK WHEN THE SEASON STARTED WITH THE CHAMPIONS CLASSIC? #1 MICHERGAN STATE PLAYED #2 KENTUCKY. OF COURSE THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS DOMMERATED THE #1 TEAM WHEN TYREED MAXEY SCORED ABOUT 2,000 POINTS AND THE CATS BECOME #1! THEY CALLED IT THE CHAMPEENS CLASSIC SO THAT OUGHTA SETTLE THE MATTER!

SEND US OUR 2020 CHAMPEEN TROPHY, NC2A! AND THEN SPEND THE SUMMER TRYIN TO FIGGER OUT HOW YOU GONNA RUIN FOOTBAW NEXT! CONGRADUMAGATIONS TO THE 2020 CHAMPEENS…THE KENTUCKY WILDCATS! AWWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! THIS TIME INSTEAD OF BURNIN COUCHES, LET’S GO BURN DOWN NC2A HEADQUARTERS! BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN! BLUE GITS IN…YOUR FACE! (laffs) COME SEE ABOUT IT! CATS! CATS! CATS!