Courier-Journal legend David Hawpe has passed away at age 78. We had lots of laughs over the years talking media, politics, and all things Kentucky. We both served on advisory boards for the College of Communications and Information at the University of Kentucky. Hawpe, the editor of Kentucky's Pulitzer Prize winning newspaper, taught me a valuable lesson in January 2002 by ripping my ass on the editorial page of the Sunday morning Courier-Journal. I wrote a blog post mocking livid UK fans in eastern Kentucky who were heaping scorn on Rick Pitino for taking the Louisville head coach job. A few days after I posted the sketch, the Lexington Herald Leader wrote a scathing front page piece entitled "Web site parody
Tag: college rivalries
The Beasman is still tore up about another Florida jinx game
THE BEASMAN florida curse continues (crying) LARRY…I CAINT TAKE IT NO MORE. STOP TAWKIN BOUT THAT GOLFER FROM LOSERVILLE AND TAWK ABOUT WHAT WE GONNA DO NOW WITH U UH KAY! (crying) I’M SO TORE UP. (crying) THE FLORIDER JINX IS CRUSHIN MY WILDCAT HEART. (crying) LITTLE WILDCAT KIDS COULDN’T GO TO SCHOOL TODAY CUZ THEY’S DEE-PRESSED. THEIR WILDCAT MOMMIES AND DADDIES STAYED HOME DRINKIN, CRYIN, AND CUSSIN THEM REFFERMARIES. (crying) IT AIN’T F-F-F-FUNNY WHEN U UH KAY LOSES. IT’S ONLY FUNNY WHEN U OF SMELL IS A F-F-F-F-FAILURE. (crying) I THUNK FOR SURE WHEN THE CATS WAS UP 27-14 THAT THE 30-YEAR JINX WAS OVER. WE WAS HIGH-FIVIN AND LAUGHIN
The Beasman can’t bear to watch UofL thrive
radio sketch, FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5, 2016, 5:40 p.m. THE BEASMAN the turnaround starts now HAS THE WORLD GONE CRAZY? U UH KAY IS ON A LOSING STREAK AND U OF SMELL IS BUILDING THE BIGGEST FOOTBAW STADIUM IN KENTUCKY. EITHER I’M HAVING A HARRIBLE NIGHTMARE OR ELSE SOMEBODY AT U UH KAY IS ASLEEP AT THE SWITCH! WAKE UP, MITCH BARNFART! WAKE UP COACH CAL! WAKE UP, MARK STOOPID! NOW I HEAR TELL THAT HOTSHOT WIDE RECEIVERS COACH WE JUST SNATCHED FROM U OF SMELL WAS ACTUALLY FIRED FROM LOSERVILLE CUZ HE SUCKS! AND HE DINT BRING LAMAR JACKSON WITH HIM! I THUNK THAT WAS THE WHOLE PLAN. MEMBER HOW COACH CAL HIRED
It starting to look like God is not a Cats fan
THE BEASMAN uk loses again air date 12/21/15 I WISH DONALD TRUMP WOULD BAN BALD HAIRED LIARS LIKE YOU FROM BEIN IN AMERICA. YOU MAKE ME SICK, YOU SLICK RICK BUTTKISSIN TRAITOR TURNCOAT TERRORIST. YOU WENT TO U UH KAY BUT YOU IS ON THE RADIO SAYIN YOU IS PULLIN FOR U OF SMELL THIS SAIRDEE. THAT’S LIKE CHEERIN FOR ISIS. IS YOU SICK IN THE HEAD OR JUST STUPID? YOU IS LYIN ABOUT LOVIN U OF SMELL BECAUSE YOU IS JUST TRYING TO MAKE YOUR GAY BOYFRIEND SLICK RICK HAPPY. EVEN HE IS A SECRET WILDCAT FAN, LARRY. YOU AIN’T FOOLIN NOBODY. ALL GOOD KENTUCKIANS IS FOR THE CATS BECAUSE
It’s always basketball season in Kentucky
Securing the 2013 NCAA Championship for Louisville occurred late in the first half when Luke Hancock popped four 3-pointers and Montrezl Harrell slammed a monster dunk to take the lead and the momentum. On April 14, 2014, both Harrell and Kentucky's Willie Cauley-Stein announced that they would return to their respective schools to play another college basketball season. Rejoicing could be heard across the Commonwealth of Kentucky, where UK's marvelous 2014 campaign ended with a disappointing loss to UConn. With the returns of Harrell and Cauley-Stein, hope springs eternal. For the most ardent fans, lessons are learned.
The Beasman is a Final Four fanboy
WHAS radio script, Friday, April 4, 2014, 5:45 p.m. THE BEASMAN final four THOSE WEREN’T NO THUNDERSTARMS YOU HEARD ALL NIGHT – THAT WAS GOD JUMPING UP AND DOWN BUCITED ABOUT HIS KENTUCKY WILDCATS BACK IN THE FINAL FOUR. DADGUMMIT, IT’S ABOUT TIME THE MAN UPSTAIRS DONE SET THINGS RIGHT AGAIN. HE LISTENED TO THE PRAYERS OF GOOD LITTLE WILDCAT BOYS AND GIRLS AND HE SAID, “WELL, I GUESS I DONE TAUGHT EM HOW TO BE HUMBLE WITH ROBERT MORRIS LAST YEAR AND THEN NOT LETTING EM HAVE THE FARDY AND OH THEY THUNK WAS A SURE THANG. OK, NOW THEY CAN DOMMERATE AGAIN.” THANK YOU, GOD. US GOOD AND CLASSY CAT FANS WON’T GIT ARROGANT NEVER AGAIN.
They’ve had a tweak to repair for this
radio script: 4:45 p.m., Friday, March 14, 2014 THE BEASMAN fear the tweak FEAR THE TWEAK, LARRY! FEAR THE TWEAK! THE ALL-NEW U UH KAY WILDCATS IS GONNA COME OUT THERE IN A LITTLE WHILE AND DOMMERATE WITH THE TWEAK. COACH CAL SAYS WE GONNA SEE THE TWEAK RIGHT AWAY AND WE GONNA BE AMAZED AT HOW SIMPLE BUT GENIUS IT IS. GO BIG BLUE! BEAT THEM L.S.LOSERS. NOW’S WHEN THE REAL FARDY AND OH TEAM SHOWS UP TO BE FARDY AND NINE! COACH CAL DONE TWEAKED THE CATS PERFECT AND NOW WE IS GONNA BEAT LSU WORSE THAN U OF SMELL BEAT THE RUTGERS LAST NIGHT. BUT U OF SMELL IS A
Memphis exported some blues to Louisville
On the day that a chastened Bobby Petrino was introduced as the reborn head coach of the University of Louisville football team, Rick Pitino's basketball team lost a critically important game at home against Memphis. The overly excited UK zealot The Beasman couldn't wait to call my radio show the next day. His transcript is printed below. THE BEASMAN memphis loss (LAFF) THE LOSERVILLE CARDINALS: THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING. DID SOMEBODY DUMP A GATORADE JUG FULL OF STUPID OVER TOM JURICH? WHAT’S HE DOIN BRINGIN THAT SNAKE IN THE GRASS BACK TO COACH YOUR FOOTBAW TEAM? WHAT Y’ALL POSED TO DO, JUST LOCK UP YOUR WIFES AND DAUGHTERS UNTIL FOOTBAW SEASON STARTS? I